The Fabulous Fourth

I love the 4th of July. The kids have so much fun every year, how could I not? This year was hard for me though. We have many very good friends and we were invited to several BBQs. It's awesome, except when you realize you can't possibly go to all of them and you'll have to make some tough decisions. So, I decided that we'd take me out of the picture and let the husband and kids decide where to go. Denver's new job requires him to be up at 4:00 in the morning, so he wanted to go to the earliest BBQ possible that the kids would still enjoy. And so we did. But well before that, we had some pancakes that Chase made. Red, white and blue of course!

While it was still pretty early, I thought I'd get the pictures out of the way so I didn't have to worry about the kids messing up their outfits. I'm glad I did, because I think it would have been pretty awful if I'd tried to make them stop playing just for some pictures.

Mia was hiding at first.

Of course, then she was dominating.

Say cheese.

She LOVES Karli.

Once Mia got to hold Karli, I could no longer get her to look at me.

He's a stud. A teenage stud.

Another stud. Only this one is 4.

I'd asked him to do a dance for me.

She was done looking at me before we even got to her solo shoot.

Mischevious.

Karli was enthralled with the grass.

Still loving the grass. I gave up trying to get her to look at me while sitting in the grass.

But even up high she was still looking down. Who knew grass was that cool?

This is my favorite one of her.

So when she finally looks up-goofy girl is what you get.

I got below her for this shot.

"Okay Mom, I'll give you one picture."

 After the photos, we went to get a few little fireworks for the kids to do at home that night. I let each of the kids pick out one firework. Corbin was ecstatic about the pack of helicopters he found. After the fireworks stand we returned home and I put the toddlers down for naps and then ran to The Z's to check on Emilio's neck. Everything looked great and after a nice visit we headed back home to get the cookie salad made for the BBQ. Mia was a big help.

 We were trying to hurry to get to the BBQ but we're also planning on camping this weekend so we had a few stops to make on the way. It didn't help that we've never been to The Warren's new house before and got lost, but we did get there. And we had an amazing time. The kids were in heaven and the food was delicious. We were planning on leaving after we ate, but Chase begged and the kids were having so much fun that I didn't have the heart to tear them away so Denver hitched a ride home so he could study and get some sleep before work. I was glad we were able to stay longer, but I did miss Daddy Rabbit. I hate watching fireworks without him. I got over it though, because I had to and because the kids kept me so busy I didn't have time to miss him too much. Karli wasn't sure about the fireworks because of the noise, so I had to hold her the entire time and talk to her after the loud ones otherwise she'd start screaming. Mia started out sitting with Bonnie, but after she fell, she only wanted me. Corbin loved every minute and didn't take his eyes off the sky once they started. He kept telling me how beautiful they were and that the blue and red ones were his favorites. I don't think Chase could have had a better time because he got to light quite a few of them. It was a great show. By the end, however, Mia was begging me to make them stop because they were too loud and she was tired and wanted to go to bed. Karli was asleep in my arms. I'd wanted to take some time and try out the new camera, but with all the children in my lap, it'll have to wait until next year...

Mia getting ready for the fireworks in her stylin' new coat.

Corbin was pointing out the fireworks.

I was trying so hard to get a picture of her startled face. She was jumping every few seconds.

Mia showing off the fireworks.

Sparklers.

I had Chase take this picture and then put the camera away for me since there was no more room in my lap.

Once the show was over we packed up the kids into the truck and they were all asleep before we even reached the main road. Well, except Chase. It was fun. Happy 4th of July!

Slaves

I was hurt today. Not to worry, it was nothing physical and nothing I won't get over. Yet, I'm still surprised at the depth of the pain. Let me explain.

This morning, Denver informed me that he changed his flight time from 3:00pm to noon. Normally, I wouldn't care, but Chase had an appointment to take part in a study and needed to be there by 9:45 and then be picked up sometime around noon. Chase has been begging to go since they were offering $25 for his participation and I didn't want to make him reschedule just so I didn't interrupt the kids' nap time and because I have an irrational fear of driving the truck in town on narrow streets to places I've never been. So irrational, that a massive ball of anxiety takes up residence in my chest constricting my lungs and making it very difficult to yell at my husband for being so crazy as to make a change in his schedule. Luckily, I am married to an amazing man that can forgive me after I explain why a change in his schedule can evoke such strong emotions from me and actually finds my reluctance to drive the truck endearing. So Denver stayed with the little ones, including Karli, while I dropped Chase off and then ran some errands-in the car. While at Shopko, I ran across a shirt that I thought Chase would really like. It was a little more expensive than I normally do (anything over $3 is expensive to me) but I decided to get it anyway because I wanted to make him happy. I rushed home so Denver could take the car and proceeded to load the tired, cranky, ready-for-naps kids into the truck and went to pick up Chase. As we were driving home, Chase started in about wanting to go play with his friends and how soon could he leave and could he do this and that and so on. I reminded him that he hadn't done any of his regular chores yet and that even though it was summer that didn't mean that he didn't have to help out around the house. Of course, the other three kids were yammering away and vying for my attention also, and Chase continued on, oblivous to the noise, asking me exactly what he had to do before he could go play. I told him that I needed him to mow the lawn and that I had another task I just couldn't remember what it was. (I've started making lists to help me remember everything, but I keep losing them-fat lot of good that does me!) As we were pulling into the drive I told Chase that since I couldn't remember the task at the moment he could finish cleaning off the porch, and I'd call it good. He got pretty mad at that, and then seethed, "Mom, why do I always have to be your slave?" Wow. I'm not quite sure why those words ripped me apart the way they did, but coupled with his anger they knocked the breath right out of me. I think Chase could tell he might have gone a little too far because his face took on an odd expression after he saw mine. I was silent for a moment and then I climbed out of the truck and began herding children back into the house. Once I'd gotten all of them inside, I turned to Chase and began listing the things I do for him. Of course I said it like this, "So you're a slave huh? Well, do slaves get rides from their owners to appointments? Do they get their own rooms over their heads and special treats from the store? Do their owners ask them what their favorite meals are and then cook them? Do they get to go play with their friends? Do slaves get new shirts from their owner just because the owner thought they'd like it?" I said the last one as I flung the shirt I'd just bought at him. And then, I didn't say anything else for a while. I cleaned and got the kids settled in for their naps. And I tried to ignore how much it really hurt that he'd said that. I know that I often joke that he's my slave, but I don't really feel like he is one. Or maybe I do sometimes. I expect an awful lot from that kid. Am I pushing him too hard? Should I back off in the amount of chores he does? And of course, the age-old question that every mother askes herself, Am I a bad Mom kept running through my head. I suppose that's why it hurt so much, because every day I do something wrong. I know I do things right also, but they're hard to remember sometimes. I only hope that the right things outnumber the wrong things and that in the end my kids will know that I'm giving them everything I've got. That even though I'm making mistakes on a daily, ususally hourly, basis, I'm still trying. I'm giving it the best I can and I know it's not enough but at least I haven't given up, right? In the end, I knew it was probably just Chase being angry and disappointed that things weren't going the way he wanted them too. In fact, I must be doing something right because Chase mowed the lawn, cleaned the porch, and then washed the doors because he'd heard me mention that they needed it. And then he came and aplogized for what he'd said and spent the rest of the day trying extra hard to help with the kids and doing whatever little chores he could think of to help me. We're gonna get through this somehow.

Should Have Known Better

Things have been a little hectic. Family visits, while wonderful, tend to leave us needing some time to catch our breath. Of course, that hasn't really been happening. Chase started Camp Lane yesterday. Although it's similar to Scout Camp, it's probably more like Girl's Camp for boys. A little more spiritual, although with a big group of boys that sounds completely contradictory. Anyway, we noticed last night that our phone wasn't working right and so we called the phone company, but they couldn't send anyone out until tomorrow. I didn't think it was too big of a deal until we noticed all the calls we were getting. I kept seeing one come in from Lane Coun-that's all the caller ID would show. We tried calling the number back with our cell phone (the emergency one) but couldn't get through. So I just plodded on housekeeping and gripping my sanity while all the work I was doing was simultaneously being undone by the little ones. Well, the calls started up again and Denver finally managed to get them on the line only he couldn't really understand them. Rather than explain that he's having a hard time hearing them, he says "You should talk to my wife, she handles this sort of thing," and passes me the phone while whispering, "Something about Chase and his eye-I don't know." Fabulous. Turns out, Chase hurt his eye and the medic at camp felt it should be checked by a doctor and they have somone headed back to town after lunch so they'll just send Chase back with him. Fortunately, Chase's doctor had an opening that afternoon and so we were off to the doctor. This visit reminded me of why I love Dr. Hemsley so much. When he came in the room to check on Chase, he asked how Chase hurt his eye and listened patiently while Chase explained how he and another boy were sword fighting with some sticks and the other boy hit his stick against a tree, breaking it and sending a fragment flying into Chase's eye. Dr. Hemsley kept a straight face through the entire story and then said, "So, it's kind of a you-deserved-it sort of thing because really, you should have known better." We all laughed then, and the doctor proceeded to check his eye. I was really wishing I had remembered my camera because the doctor put a solution in his eye that glows bright green under a black light, making Chase look really creepy, but also letting us see the giant scratch that started about the middle of Chase's pupil and went to the end of his eye. It was a pretty wicked looking scratch. The doctor started him on antibiotic eye drops and made me promise to bring him back the next day if there was no improvement. Fortunately, by the next morning Chase's eye looked and felt much better and Chase was able to catch a ride back to camp. And I have a feeling that Chase will be a little more cautious because really, he should have known better.

Dentists and Poop

Today the kids all had dentist appointments. Or so I thought. When I originally made the appointments, I spent 45 minutes on the phone with a woman who sounded as if she'd never made an appointment before in her life. So when I came home and listened to the message on the answering machine telling me that there were only appointments for Corbin and Mia, I didn't bother to call back and check. I just couldn't take the chance that the same woman would answer and I figured we'd deal with it when we got there. So we made it a family affair and we ALL went. That's right, even Denver. He didn't have anything super pressing at the time and I told him that this appointment just became his top priority. That or he could stay home with Karli so that I could focus on keeping the others in check. Silly man decided to come. Good news-Chase and Corbin were able to see the dentist and neither one of them had cavities! Oh yeah, that's right. Bad news-Mia has to wait a couple of months until her appointment, and she was very sad. I really didn't think she'd care, but I was wrong. Now, every time I go to leave the house she's asking if it's her turn to see the dentist. And Corbin keeps begging to go back. I wonder if it's because the gal that cleaned his teeth was so awesome and he got to wear glasses, and sit in the moving chair and count his teeth and tell her all about dinosaurs having teeth. Or maybe it was the time spent in the waiting room. Everyone was very nice and there was an elderly woman in an electric wheelchair that let him push a couple of buttons and then when she mentioned something about singing he stood right up and sang his favorite Primary song, "Stand for the Right." I'm not sure she caught all the words but I did and I loved it. And on the way home I told my boys how very proud I was and then we reminisced about the first time Chase went to the dentist. I'll admit it wasn't as fun as Corbin's, but it makes a good story. The first time Chase went to the dentist, I was anxious. I was a single mom at the time and there wasn't a whole lot of wiggle room for appointments. We arrived early and all was going well until Chase, who was roughly 4 at the time, gave me a look and said, "Mom, I need to go to the baffroom. I pooped." Chase had been potty trained for months, and had NEVER pooped his pants. Until that day. I thought he may have mispoken and meant that he just needed to poop. Nope. He'd pooped. A lot. So I stepped out and told the receptionist that I was going to have to run home and change him, which might put us a little late. She was a little skeptical at first, but I knew we were close and there was no way I could reschedule-I just had too much going on. So we jumped in the car and sped all the way back home. During the drive, I was prepping Chase for what we were going to do. He'd run in the bathroom and get his pants off while I ran and got him some clean clothes. I had him take his shoes off in the car to save a little time. And I thought things were going well until I went into the bathroom and saw-well, poop. A giant smear of poop all the way down the side of my tub. Chase was trying to do what I'd asked but his little legs and arms just weren't coordinated  and he fell while trying to get his pants off. Poor little guy. We pressed on and I got him clean and back to the dentist five minutes after his appointment should have started. I was impressed. And when they took him right back and he hopped up into the chair and opened his mouth as wide as he possibly could, before the dentist even got his gloves on, I knew he'd be fine. And he was. No cavities that time either. I'm so glad that he's following that trend-I mean the no cavities trend, not the poopy pants!

TEENAGER! Help us all!

I have a teenager. Officially. He's been working up to it for a while now and I think he's ready. He's got the eye-roll, the shoulder shrug and the I-don't-care attitude, so yeah, I'd say he's ready. I'm not, but we'll figure it out as we go. It's what we've always done. Since he lost his friend birthday party I wanted to make sure his day was special. I got up early and made crepes and orange julius. When he saw it he got really excited and asked how I knew to make exactly what he wanted. I just smiled and said that moms just know. I was thinking that it was obvious since he asks every other day or so if he can make crepes or julius. Apparently he doesn't realize how often he asks. It works for me because it helps keep up the moms=magic myth I've got going on around here. After he left for school, I had Denver help me carry his new bed upstairs and spent the next 3 hours putting it together. I'm excited about how it turned out.

After the bed was done and the kids were asleep, I ran to the dollar store for decorations and a new mattress. I managed to get it all done and get back home before anyone woke up. Yeah, serious mom magic going on there. Or luck. Either way it worked. The kids and I then spent the afternoon blowing up balloons and getting everything ready for dinner.

We had chicken alfredo per birthday boy's request. And we ate outside because it was a nice evening and birthday boy wanted to. Our friends, Ian & Alysha Best, and Hunter, came to have dinner with us. Also per birthday boy's request. I was happy to have them here. They are the Best-Ha ha, been dying to throw that cheesy one in there! After dinner there was cake...

Chase wanted peanut butter chocolate crockpot cake. It's really delicious but doesn't make for the best pictures.

This one's a little better of the cake. And it also demonstrates what a teenager looks like. Perfectly.

Presents! This is the air soft gun that Corbin picked out for Chase. Don't know who was more excited, Chase or Corbin.

He wasted no time in getting it ready to go though. Look at him loading that baby up. Meanwhile...

I wanted to know how bad it hurt to get hit with one. Denver was very obliging. If you look closely at the picture though, you can see Corbin is NOT okay with this. I want to say it's because he didn't want Dad to shoot Mom, but really it's because he wanted to shoot Mom himself.

And of course, I thought Denver would also want to know how it felt. And no, we did not stage this to look like an execution-Denver wanted to protect his ears! I have to say the the biggest hit of the night however, was the Mentos and Diet Coke geyser that Aunt Bess sent.

Here they are getting ready....

And we have explosion! I tried to get the entire geyser in the picture but it went too high. Chase hasn't stopped talking about it since and has been planning ways to make an even bigger geyser with empty milk jugs, extra bottles of Diet Coke and who knows what else.

I am extremely lucky to have such a teenager. He is an amazing young man. He's always been willing to help and his siblings adore him. He's very smart, loyal, and thoughtful-always looking out for others. Why, he even gave me a present on his birthday, no missing assignments and all A's and B's! I am so proud of how hard he works and how he never stops trying. I know the years ahead will be rocky-for both of us-but my son is truly a Son of God. A choice spirit brought to earth at this time because of his strength and because he's needed now. I am humbled to think I have been trusted to be the mother of such a boy. Blessed doesn't even begin to cover it. I love you, Chase. Happy Birthday!

TP anyone?

 Woke up this morning to a little surprise....

Yes, that does say, "Hi Chase".

 Who in the world would do this, and leave candy (that's what's in his hand)?

Ahhh. It all makes sense now. Sierra, Chase's friend, had a sleepover for her 13th birthday. To be honest, I wasn't surprised at all because her mom had called me the night before to make sure it was okay. That's probably a good thing because when I noticed the flashes from a camera around midnight I wasn't concerned. And it was fun watching Chase speculate about who could have done this and why. Corbin was just concerned that there was such a big mess in the yard and kept saying, "That's not nice. Mom, that's not nice, right?" Mia thought it was snow. I wish I'd had the camera ready when the girls came to clean up, because Chase's face was awesome! And the girls had it all cleaned up within 10 minutes even with the little ones climbing all over them. Thanks for the laughs girls! We sure had fun on this end. And I suppose I should get used to this, Chase will be a teenager in a couple of days...

Had to be done...

My son Chase. He rolls his eyes when he thinks you're not looking. He sulks. His voice cracks and he no longer tells me about the girls he likes. I now ask him to open jars for me. I have to put forth effort to win at board games. He is doing math that I no longer remember, and when I want to know what 9 x 6 is, I ask him. And even with all this, I can't see him as anything other than my little boy. The little boy that would do anything to make his mom happy. The one who would hold my hand whenever possible. The one who dragged a gallon of milk into my bedroom at 3 o'clock in the morning because he was thirsty and couldn't pour it himself. This sweet little boy. Every illness, every heartache he's had, I've suffered with him. I've even felt heartaches yet to come that he's completely unaware of. So what do I do when I'm the one that causes his distress?
Last Friday night, Chase was caught sneaking out. UGH! Technically, we caught his friend in the yard that came to meet him so they could go play cards. Nonetheless, they admitted they'd done it once before. Obviously, this isn't something that we could just ignore. After a long lecture-Mom you'd have been proud-I drove Chase's friend home. When I returned, Denver was sitting on the couch eating popcorn. He'd told Chase he was just going to sit back and watch the show that he was sure I was going to put on. I hated to disappoint him, but I knew we needed to discuss things and I was too upset and angry to be doling out punishments. Besides, I remember how it felt to know I was in BIG trouble with a lurking punishment hanging over my head. Fear of the unknown, right? So we let him sweat it for a few days. Chase was already grounded for missing assignements at school and poor grades, so that was out. I've also been taking him to and from school because we can't trust him to be where he's supposed to be, so really what more could we do? And then it came to me. Chase has been begging me for a paintball birthday party. He's turning 13, and I'd told him he could pretty much decide what he wanted to do. But it was too harsh. I knew how much it meant to him. Yet, I couldn't deny that this was what I was supposed to do. I've learned not to argue with promptings, and if I'm going to pray every night for guidance in how to help Chase get through these difficult years, then by golly, I'm going to do what I know to be right, even if it breaks my heart. Chase reacted a lot differently than I expected. I explained to him that by taking him to and from school we were using up a lot of gas and a lot of my time. Not to mention that a paintball party is for responsible people, and he hadn't shown us that he fits into that category at this time. I told him that we'd still have a family birthday party, presents, cake, the whole works, he just wasn't going to get the friend party that he'd wanted. He nodded while a few tears rolled down his face and then silently went to bed. And I broke. I cried. And then I cried some more. And just when I thought it would end-I continued crying. I tried to blame Denver for making me go through with it, but it was my idea in the first place. Truth is, Denver gives me the strength to do what is right, because without Denver, I probably would have caved, knowing that it was wrong. With Denver, however, I am able to break my son's heart and mine as well, because it is what is best for him. My sweet little boy.

Eleven

If you're wondering what you missed this weekend, keep going and you'll get the general idea.

You guessed it. Chase turned 11. (I didn't have eleven candles so we just put one and one together to make eleven.) That's him with his six layer german chocolate cake that his ubertalented mother made. All I can say is-at least it didn't fall over, and yes I was worried that it might.
Apparently the two candles confused Corbin and had him thinking his birthday was a little early this year and that he should be the one the blow out the candles...Don't worry, Chase got them in the end. (I think that we only had to re-lite the candles three times, maybe four.)

I love this picture because it captures Chase's real smile, not the dopey looking fake one in so many shots. And just in case you're wondering, Chase got to do his hair however he wanted.

Who knew Cheese Balls would be such a hit!

You'd think the kid had never seen a $50 dollar bill before.

I wish I had some pictures of Chase with his Dad and friends playing laser tag, but Mom forgot to remind Dad to take the camera. She was probably a little bit busy finishing the cake, wrapping the presents, and making up a few rhymes for the impromptu treasure hunt she planned for the boys on their return. (Had to have something to keep them busy while the pizza cooked.) I think it was successful and that Chase had a good day. My favorite line from the weekend though was when Chase was asked by Gama how he felt on his birthday and his reply, " Old and rich." PRICELESS!